Rabbit Hole Carnival: Morning Never Comes

“Again?” Renee replied, as she walked in with a sigh. “I'll be a few more minutes.” With that she walked into the storage area.

“She’s not a fan of these little moments of yours I take it?” Raymond asked.

“She hasn’t had the best experiences with therapists.” Nick replied. “She was sent to a lot of them by her father. I've been trying to find her someone that is a bit more rational.”

“Oh please, just call me Ray. Both of you.” Raymond said.

“Let’s just get this over with.” Renee replied, and turned a chair 180 degrees, and sat in it backwards. If that’s alright, Ray?”

“Renee could you at least—” Nick began, before Ray spoke up.

“Mister Shem, from what I’ve been told I would rather this, non-binary was it? Be allowed to act out as she sees fit.” He looked at Renee. “With that said you’re fine, if your uncle stays with us?

Renee paused briefly before she spoke. “It wouldn’t be anything he hasn’t heard before”

“Very well, Do you mind if I begin with some basic questions?” Ray asked.

“You have the identity, and pronouns. No, I have not swapped bodies in any sense of the word. About 4 years, and I pretty much always call him, daddy.” She pointed to Nick. “That cover everything?”

Raymond chuckled and nodded. “Done this too many times, it seems. Unfortunate, but, I suppose, it does make this go faster.” Ray adjusted his glasses. “Technically you did miss whenever or not I should address him as Mike, but you imply the answer quite well.”

“No one ever has ever asked that.” Renee said. “They usually just address him as my father, and Nick as my dad or uncle.”

“Has that often been a complaint of hers, Nick?” Ray asked.

“It very often comes up.” Nick answered. “I, myself, never fully understood the aversion, but I’ve always respected that it was one. I kept trying to tell them not to do that, but sort of gave up after a bit. I mean if they aren’t going to take it straight from the horse's mouth.”

“They just think that’s what the job is, or have some passion or bias or something.” Renee said.

“I don’t fully agree, but I think there is something to that statement.” Ray replied. “There is often at least some pressure to repair that which can’t be fixed.”

“I really am just trying to help, Renee” Nick replied.

“Daddy, if I didn’t think that was true I would never have sat down to begin with.” Renee said. “I would just storm up to my room, and locked the door that you no longer have the key for.”

“She put a great deal of trust in you, Nick.” Raymond nodded along. “That she is here at all despite her small outbursts is quite the testament.”

“Would you mind testing a drink, Ray?” Renee asked. “It’s a small little thanksgiving project I’ve been working on. But if you don’t drink on the job I understand.”

“You are my last client of the day.” Ray thought for a moment. “Mixing drinks calms you?”

“I wouldn’t say calms.” Renee replied. “I suppose you kind of picked up on it, daddy?”

Nick nodded. “If she is this much focused on making a drink, typically she wants to get her mind off something. She has advanced for other reasons, mind you, but the last time I saw her making her own…”

“Go on?” Ray replied.

“The last time I made my own.” Renee said. “Was days after I stumbled to this bar literally bruised.”

“I see.” Ray replied. “Has Mike been showing up a bit more?”

“Once.” Nick replied. “She has been working on this a couple months before then.”

“Is it Jojo?” Ray asked, just as Renee was about to open her mouth.

“I keep wanting to run.” Renee replied. “But I actually like it here, at least it is away from the worst of it. It’s amazing even. But everyone judges me for that decision. I finally got to morning, and still morning never comes.”

“That’s often a difficult journey, my dear.” Ray replied, and as he got up and grabbed her shoulder. “But you seem tired. Why don’t you sleep?”

“A nap sounds lovely.” Renee. “But I want your opinion on that drink next time.” Renee walked upstairs.

“Even her tone reminds of the night she just slept on the upstairs couch” Nick said.

“Mister Shem.” Ray replied. “More often than not, Those like Renee, Are too used to being spoken at, and not spoken to. But at this moment in time. I believe she is coming into her own quite a bit better than most. And I would suspect that you have a big part to play in that, then we shall ever know.” ” Ray adjusted his glasses. “ I shall be back for that new drink. Same time next week.”